What I have learned as a Homeschool Parent
Sometimes you may need to take a day off and it's ok.
A lot has been shared on social media these last few weeks around home education in America. There have been a LOT of tears from frustrated parents and children. Boy have I been there. Guess what? Even as a seasoned homeschool mom, I STILL get there. You know what I have learned about days like that? It's ok to take a day off. Somedays you just need to put away all the lists and plans and just BE! Maybe that means you grab pillows and blankets and stay in jammies and watch TV until dinner time. Maybe you turn on music and dance in the living room. Maybe you declare it "book day" and all you do is read books. Guess what? It's OK! One day is not going to hurt anyone. In fact, it's really important to listen to your own body and the emotion of your kids. The worst thing you can do is push either of you into hysterics. Trust me. I have been there. Just take a deep breath and take a day off.
Sometimes you may be your child's best friend and sometimes their worst nightmare.
Some days are going to feel like a magical after school special where everyone is dressed, fed, productive, and happy. Other days, you are going to be the meanest mom (or dad) in the world! Yup. It happens. Just the other day, I was up with my 10th grader until 10pm helping him finish work he had skipped earlier in the day. He wanted to just play his computer games and "relax". I said, "Well, buddy, that sounds super awesome but you didn't finish your work earlier like you said you had so we have to finish it before you get to play." Guys, I seriously thought he was going to punch me right in the face, he was so mad!!! But guess what? We got through it. It was tough and he super hated it but when he was done, he was SO relieved. The important thing to learn there is that you can't let them take advantage and say, "I will get caught up tomorrow" Every once in a while is ok, for sure. But don't let them get in the habit. It creates problems later on. It was a sacrifice for both of us, but it was a life lesson that needed to be learned; finishing work on a deadline and not putting off work for another day.
Sometimes you may feel like you are ruining your child permanently.
OH you sweet parent. I get it. I really do. I can't tell you how many tears I shed over my sweet children thinking that I was just a terrible homeschool teacher and my children would never be productive members of society. I have learned that as long as I am exposing my children to a variety of topics, they are LEARNING!
Guess what? Zoom chats and Google Chats are GREAT! If you think you definitely can't teach your child a certain topic and you need help, maybe you know someone who does. It never hurts to ask a friend or family member to help you out. My mom is a math tutor and tutors my 15 year old in Geometry for an hour every week. She lives in Washington State and we are in Virginia. We have learned to make it work. Sometimes, your child may just need someone else to do the teaching. If you can, do but don't be afraid to say 'I don't know'. Learn it along side of them or ask for help. "No man is an island."
Another great thing I have realized is that it's not just about book learning but LIVING. Teach your kids, even the young ones, how to cook and clean. Reading, writing, and math are important but take time to use those in real life! Read a recipe together. Teach them to fold and sort. For the older kids, teach them to iron. Give them chores! Even my 4 year old son with Autism knows how to put his dirty clothes in the hamper. So many skills can be learned and applied while just doing things around the house. Keep them moving and keep their brains working. I promise you, you are not ruining them! You got this.
Sometimes you may feel like giving up or selling your children to the highest bidder.
Don't give up, but don't be afraid to walk away. It's healthy to let your children know that you are having a hard time and are in need of a break. Be real with them.
"The way you are talking right now is really frustrating to me. I need to take a break so I can be nice."
Give YOURSELF a time out before you take out your frustrations on them. Remember, if you are at the point where you want to give up or sell your children, it's probably time for a day off. Make some cookies. Get some chairs and blankets. Make a fort and take a break.Like I said in the beginning. I have 4 kids, y'all. It's HARD to find something that we can all do together at one time. Don't expect so much of yourself. It's ok to let some of the kids do something by themselves while you do some one-on-one time with another. My 17 year old may not really want to play blanket fort, but I bet if I said, "Grab your headphones and your phone. You can play games or listen to music but we are going to hang out in the fort for a while together." You may be surprised at what happens. :D
Another idea for if you have older kids and younger kids, assign the older kids to read to the younger kids or play a game with them. Put yourself in a 20-30 min time out and come back when you can love them again. ;)
Sometimes you may feel like the best darn teacher in the universe.
Some days are going to run so smooth you will feel like you FINALLY got this homeschool jive down. Don't discredit those days. In fact, write it down somewhere! Write about your day. What worked? What didn't work? How did you adapt? What was the BEST part of the day. Be a "learn it all" Learn from YOURSELF! Don't forget to share that success with your kids. Don't be afraid to brag to your kids. They need to see you congratulate yourself just as much as they need your praise to them.
Something I do with my 1 year old at nap time and at bedtime is I recount to her what she did that day.
"We played with playdough. We read books. We played with brother. We had a nummy snack. We watched Abby Hatcher. We colored. It was a good day!"
This not only helps with so many things....sequencing, language, memory, etc, but it helps me to remember that we did some pretty fun things together. It helps solidify memories and helps me to feel like a success.
Mom, Dad, Auntie, Uncle, Grandma, Grandpa...whoever and wherever you are. You can do this. Promise. It's ok to take a break, get tough, succeed, fail, or ask for help. Just don't give up.
You GOT this!
Here are just a few resources I have learned and loved:
Online:
www.allinonehomeschool.com
www.allinonehighschool.com
www.k12.com
www.timeforlearning.com
www.khanacademy.com
www.pbskids.org
www.myon.com
www.xtramath.org
www.sesamestreet.org
Apps:
Speech Blubs
ABC Mouse
Reading IQ
Books:
Thomas Jefferson Education
Life of Fred
Story of the World
Most are free. Some require subscriptions or logins. Choose what works best for you and be ok to walk away from it if it just isn't a good fit for you. If you have any questions or need a pep talk, I am here for you. Just leave a comment and I will be sure to answer.
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